Year 2019 you are by far my favorite year despite all the turbulence.

I remember my vision of God this year about having a taste of what its like having a visual wedding with Jesus, and afterwards, I experience a terrible homesickness longing for that taste of kingdom of heaven once again, I was having a psalm 84 moments MANY TIMES (Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere, I would rather be a doorkeeper in His house… etc). Homesickness isn’t pretty especially when I am living a life set apart on a wide road, I continually seek that narrow road, I continually have that Psalm 27 moment until I find Him.

And I realise…….

As I grow in my relationship with Jesus, He revealed that I have always been one in him in spirit and in truth, because I am married to Jesus in spirit and in truth. The kingdom of heaven is in me in spirit and in truth. He has deposited His Spirit in me. So all this time my homesickness was pointless but at the same time it isn’t cuz it made me seek HIM even more, to be at this exact point of revelation wherein the words I will never leave nor forsake you is not just a promise but also a vow of His faithfulness. (Teary eyed as I write this). The longing to God is still here don’t get me wrong, seeking Him is a lifestyle not just a habit of mine, I will keep feeding the spirit, to fight the good fight of faith against the flesh and darkness. I realise this year as I continue to love God, I now live unveiled (no more shame, guilt, secret condemnation, self-hate) and i’ve become love, pure one by faith – white as snow, an heir, Father’s daughter, Bride, and light.

And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the Lord .
Hosea 2:19‭-‬20 ESV

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
Romans 14:17 ESV

You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord , and a royal diadem in the hand of your God. You shall no more be termed Forsaken, and your land shall no more be termed Desolate, but you shall be called My Delight Is in Her, and your land Married; for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married. For as a young man marries a young woman, so shall your sons marry you, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.
Isaiah 62:3‭-‬5 ESV

For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.”
Romans 1:17 ESV

….Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses..
1 Timothy 6 ESV